Dec 09
29
Re-solution to those New Year Resolutions
The Christmas festivities are all but finished as we begin our preparation for the New Year. The New Year is a great time to meet up with family and friends to celebrate and ‘welcome’ the forthcoming year; it is seen as a time for a new beginning, a time to make changes. It’s also a time when we make resolutions for the forthcoming year; resolutions that support the changes we intend to make for our ‘new start’. However, as with many other instances of change in our lives, all our good intention is soon forgotten as we face up to the ‘challenge of change’. As first the drive, then the passion for our resolutions dwindles away, leaving them in tatters. All we are left with is the same old life style we’ve been leading for the previous twelve months and before. As you would expect the reasons for our failings is supported by a plethora of excuses. Excuses, as to why it hasn’t worked this time (again); excuses such as:
- I’m not ready for it
- I’m not in the mood or right frame of mind
- I haven’t got the time
- I’m too busy
- I’m short of money after Christmas
- I’ll start later in the year
- etc. and the list goes on . . .
The above excuses lead to the following, obvious questions:
- When will you be ready?
- When will you be in the mood or right frame of mind?
- When will you have the time?
- When will you not be too busy?
- When will you not be short of money?
- What’s the difference between starting now and starting later in the year?
We are not the best at accepting change; even more so when it is applied from an external source, such as your boss or even your life partner. So when we decide to make changes through our own New Year resolutions, what are the reasons for our failures, if the resolutions have come from our own internal thought processes. One of the key reasons why people fail when making changes, is not making room for those changes in their life. We all very busy and full lives; there is little room for any additions. When we make changes to our lives, such as New Year resolutions, it means we are adding something to our busy schedule, so we need to make one or two alterations. As with changes to anything; whether it’s your Personal Development or some other element of your life, the process and resulting alterations demand room or a place in your life. A re-arrangement of your current lifestyle is required. Consider the following quote:
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you always got.” Mark Twain
One solution
There are a couple of approaches to dealing with change; problem focused and solution focused. Problem focused is the more popular of the two, however it’s not the most effective, which is quite usual. The method entails a step by step approach to solving the problem:
- naming the problem
- analysing the problem
- exploring possible solutions
- taking the necessary action
The method does work to some extent, however it becomes a self sustaining problem in itself because it relies on the problem to enable the success to occur.
Another solution
On the other hand the solution focused approach searches for examples of where the change has taken place or where people have made the change and been successful. If you are unable to find any such examples, imagine instances of the changes you want to take place. Focus on them and encourage yourself using positive self talk, self promote them to yourself, understand their value. Practice the new behaviours you want to see in yourself. What this will do is, remove the negative approach of “I can’t do . . .” and replace it with “I can do . . .”
Referring back to the excuses posed at the beginning of the post; try asking yourself the question “what would . . . ?”:
- I’m not ready for it – What would happen if you were ready?
- I’m not in the mood or right frame of mind – What would you do if you were in the mood or right frame of mind?
- I haven’t got the time – What would you do if you did have the time?
- I’m too busy – What would you do if you weren’t too busy?
- I’m short of money after Christmas – What would you do if you weren’t short of money?
- I’ll start later in the year – What would you do if you started today?
So when you set your New Year resolutions this time please continue with them, give them time to succeed, talk them up and be positive. Look for success rather than failures, encourage yourself and refrain from being put off by idle chit-chat from your family and friends. Nobody ever said your self development or personal growth would be easy; be determination and a ‘desire to win’ is key to your succeed. If you really want to make that change; you can, make 2010 a year of successes. Good luck.
I would like to take this opportunity to wish all the readers of diary 4 life a Happy and Prosperous New Year.
Thank you for reading this post, please let me know what you think and share your experiences. While you’re here please take the time to sign up for the newsletter or alternatively you may prefer to subscribe for regular updates in your favourite reader or by email.
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View Comments "Re-solution to those New Year Resolutions"
Great Paul, in order to win people have to have a winning attitude. A winning attitude leads to victory ultimately. And attitude defines altitude. Procrastinating and finding 1000 excuses in order to avoid action which will lead to real change and improvement, is a quality that leaders are not familiar with.
Have a wonderful New Year, it is a pleasure to have met you and sharing the wealth of our inner worlds and beliefs.
Regards
Joanna,
Thank you for your comment. A winning attitude is a must for success; dispensing with the procrastination.
Have a great New Year; I look forward to working with you more in 2010 to share ideas and thoughts.
Regards
Paul
[...] Bring in the changes Filed under Performance View commentsComments digg_url = 'http://www.diary4life.com/bring-in-the-changes/'; digg_title = 'Bring in the changes'; digg_bodytext = 'Are you looking to improve your performance with your New Year resolutions this year. Is it time to 'swing the axe' on all those old habits; this time with real meaning rather than the usual half hearted attempt. 2009 has now finished and we are faced with a brand new year; 2010. Never before have you had the opportunity to face the coming year'; Are you looking to improve your performance with your New Year resolutions this year. Is it time to ’swing the axe’ on all those old habits; this time with real meaning rather than the usual half hearted attempt. 2009 has now finished and we are faced with a brand new year; 2010. Never before have you had the opportunity to face the coming year; it’s a completely new experience. Yes, you’ve faced a new year before but never a new year with last years experiences to learn from. Last years experiences, where you said, “never again” or may be, “I want some more of this, how can I improve on it?” A previous post discusses a “Re-solution to those New Year resolutions”, read it here [...]
[...] Bring in the changes Filed under Performance View commentsComments digg_url = 'http://www.diary4life.com/bring-in-the-changes/'; digg_title = 'Bring in the changes'; digg_bodytext = 'Are you looking to improve your performance with your New Year resolutions this year. Is it time to 'swing the axe' on all those old habits; this time with real meaning rather than the usual half hearted attempt. 2009 has now finished and we are faced with a brand new year; 2010. Never before have you had the opportunity to face the coming year'; Are you looking to improve your performance with your New Year resolutions this year. Is it time to ’swing the axe’ on all those old habits; this time with real meaning rather than the usual half hearted attempt. 2009 has now finished and we are faced with a brand new year; 2010. Never before have you had the opportunity to face the coming year; it’s a completely new experience. Yes, you’ve faced a new year before but never a new year with last years experiences to learn from. Last years experiences, where you said, “never again” or may be, “I want some more of this, how can I improve on it?” A previous post discusses a “Re-solution to those New Year resolutions”, read it here [...]
yes, great posting. thanks for sharing. I will do steps that explained in this article
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